having a meal with you - 10/26/23

To start things off, this poem took inspiration from the work "Having a Coke with You" by Frank O'Hara. It was written about a dearly loved long-distance friend who is a former member of my polycule; "Having a Coke with You" is one of his favorite poems. The "would rather" format and the reference to drifting are taken directly from O'Hara's work, and the "will be"s are meant to reflect the initial "is" lines in his poem. I also tried to evoke a similar degree of imagery as him in my second stanza.

Beyond the inspiration taken from O'Hara, I wrote this in my ususal manner: Letting my subconscious control the rhythm, word choice, and other poetic devices. I plan on addressing that in my own work throughout this project, making my work and use of devices more deliberate in how I write. One thing I wrote purposefully was the repetition of "hopefully"; another was the weight in the final line of "except i feel it more.".

I hope that as I continue to work on this project, I will be able to pick apart my own work better and be able to speak to more deliberate and delicate choices in my poetry.

mater dolorosa - 11/1/23

This poem was written about my older brother's passing, an event that devastated my family. One of the things that was hardest for me in the aftermath was my mother's grief, and seeing the effect it had on her. I personally don't think there can possibly be a greater pain on this earth than what she (and many other mothers) endured.

My work in this poem was already much more deliberate, with parallels and rhymes utilized in various moments. I tried to remain aware as I wrote of how many syllables I used for each line, as well as when I changed the rhythm in the work. I purposefully rhymed "mother" and "brother", as well as repeating first syllables between "river" and "rivulets". I also repeated "day after day" and set my strength and weakness in a purposeful dichotomy.

The final two lines carry the most weight, and these are actually the lines I started the poem knowing I wanted to get to. My fiance and I had had a conversation that led to me posing that question, and that question is what this poem bloomed from.

untitled poem - 11/4/23

This poem was about loving someone in a romantic way who doesn't feel the same about you. I toyed with my syllable work this time--each line has 8 syllables, except the last. I think it changes the rhythm in an interesting and deliberate way, though I don't think I'm partial enough to the difference to use this method in every poem going forward. I've found that I do prefer my more natural rhythms that I've used prior to this. Beyond that, it's pretty standard fare for a yearning poem.

drank strawberry lemonade today and thought of you - 11/11/23

I wrote this about my former polycule member, who is still very dear to me. I played around with where I broke up the lines in this one, starting new lines at non-natural points in the sentence. I also was careful with my imagery--originally, it was going to have the sunlight filtering down to me in the depths, but I realized that would clash with the firework imagery, and I shifted what I wrote accordingly. I think it's a stronger poem for it!

love letter to a spare protagonist - 11/14/23

This poem was long enough to be split into two screenshots! Growing up, I usually either had my head in a book or else was roleplaying adventures by myself in the woods. Because I was adopted and hadn't processed any of my trauma yet, I was generally convinced that I was going to be a protagonist of something, a chosen one just waiting to be taken away to my "real" family and to become the hero of the story.

As I got older, I did realize that that of course was not going to happen. It was a tough thing to come to terms with, though, and took a long time--and the older I got, the more it felt like I had missed my chance. This poem is about accepting that, and turning it into an opportunity of its own. It's a hopeful poem.

ICARUS AND ARIADNE; OR: CHILDREN OF THEIR FATHERS - 11/25/23

Writing this poem came from thinking about how Ariadne and Icarus share similarities, and also how Icarus shares similarity with the Minotaur--both trapped in the labyrinth Daedalus built. It's been a while since I wrote a prose poem, and this one let me venture into that final area of practice for this project. The don't you know? no i don't is left purposefully blurried between who says what: these people reflect each other in care for their parents who failed them. There is also the thread of the game Ariadne is playing, ending as she faces the loss of that innocence and trust in their fathers. I also had one of my almost hallmarks of my poetry, with a hard hitting final line built up to through the poem.